Funniest collection about food puns
Marie Antoinette said that feeding the peasants was a piece of cake.
Most airline food is pretty bad, but their haggis is just plane offal.
Mothers everywhere want their children to give peas a chance.
My attempt at starting a street market turned out to be fruitile.
My dog was mustard-colored. That made him a Gulden Retriever.
My famous bacon soup recipe began as an add hock meal.
My job as head chef at a top rated restaurant is in jeopardy because my latest culinary creation was called a recipe for disaster.
My wife uses a kitchen implement to shred garlic and parmesan cheese, which I hate. It really is the grater of two evils.
Never build model people close to the ocean. You might lose your sand dolls in the waves.
Never eat popcorn shrimp. There’s something fishy about them.
No one wanted to see the naked banana.
On December 7th I took a lady to dinner. I did not have a good time. It was a date that will live in infamy forever.
One ear of corn said to the other ‘You’re getting husky’.
One of the first things you’ll notice at the Beijing airport is a whole lot of Chinese checkers.
People often ask me if I enjoy working with seafood. I tell them I’m accident prawn.
People who eat their apples stem and seed and all improve their core values.
Rocky Road chocolate is best served stone cold.
Sellers of dried grapes are always raisin awareness.
She took lots of crunchy foods to her radio interview, for the sound bites.
Short-order cooks in busy restaurants call themselves ‘pressure cookers’.
Since her kind gift of a lemon cake I rate her as one of Madeira friends.
So I’m opening up a pool-side Mexican grilled chicken restaurant. I’m calling it Marco Pollo.
Some of us are like potatoes: thick skinned but soft inside when warmed.
Someone who really loves cheese has a fetash.
Sweet potatoes? I yam impressed!
The big city reporter did not impress the Idaho potato farmer, after all he was just a commentator.
The British cannibal enjoyed snacking on fish and chaps.
The cannibal hitman preferred take out food.
The Chinese pizzeria murder mystery genre is a novel dough mein.
The crowd at the Cannibal’s party grew silent when he announced he would be serving finger foods.
The food taster quit his job because he had too much on his plate.
The fruit farmer was plum happy he pruned his orchard last fall.
The girl said she recognized me at the vegetarian restaurant. But I’ve never met herbivore!
The health food customer purchased fibre optics from the optometry centre for accurate eyesight.
The lights were too bright at the Chinese restaurant so the manager decided to dim sum.
The magician who loved his chocolate could perform a lot of Twix.
The man brought an umbrella with him into the ice cream store because he heard there was a chance of sprinkles. Adele M.
The man who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
The pod vegetables I bought for the gumbo I was making were so-so. They were medi-okra.
The produce grocer keeps his eyes peeled for potatoes and slips through bunches of bananas every week at the farmers market.
The raisin wined about how he couldn’t achieve grapeness.
The rotten food in the garbage can behind the restaurant was covered with flies. To the vectors go the spoils.
The rotting food in the garbage can behind the restaurant was covered with flies. To the vectors go the spoils.
The short-order crook poached his eggs, shaved his chocolate, welched on his rabbits, and even his pastry was stollen.
The soldier who survived mustard gas and pepper spray is now a seasoned veteran.
There was a fight in the candy store. Two suckers got licked.
There was a sale at the fish market today. I went to see what was the catch.
There’s nothing grate about sliced cheese.
Thieves who steal corn from a garden could be charged with stalking.
Those who change the color of their food are on a dye-it.
I relish the fact that you’ve mustard the strength to ketchup to me.
I decided that becoming a vegetarian was a missed steak.
The frustrated cannibal threw up his hands.
When making butter there is little margarine for error.
When a clock is hungry it goes back four seconds.
Did you hear the one about the woman who threw her toaster away because it kept burning the bread?
She was black toast intolerant.
My mom ran out of poultry seasoning so she winged it.
My best friend and I attended culinary school together and then opened our own restaurant. I guess we are taste buds.
Yesterday my fridge thought it was a microwave, so we got into a heated fight. But we’re cool now.
I get distracted by all the meats in the deli section, must be my short attention spam.
TOP 75 Funny Food Puns
1- Now what’s on the menu? Me-n-u.
2- I am on a seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.
3- Turning vegan is a big missed steak.
4- Did you hear about the Italian chef that died? He pasta way.
5- What did the apple say to the orange? Nothing stupid… apples don’t talk!
6- Why did the students eat their homework? Because the teacher said that it was a piece of cake.
7- What’s a vegetable’s favourite casino game? Baccarrot!
8- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing.
9- What is orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot! 10- Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because he’s a
10- Why was the mushroom invited to the party? Because he’s a fun-guy. 11- What do you call spiritual cheese? Cheeses of Nazareth. 12- What do you call a sleeping pizza? A piZZZZZZaa. 13- What do you give to a sick lemon?
11- What do you call spiritual cheese? Cheeses of Nazareth. 12- What do you call a sleeping pizza? A piZZZZZZaa. 13- What do you give to a sick lemon?
12- What do you call a sleeping pizza? A piZZZZZZaa. 13- What do you give to a sick lemon?
13- What do you give to a sick lemon? Lemon aid! 14- Why don’t they serve chocolate in prison? A: Because it makes you break out! 15- What kind of keys do kids like to carry? Cookies! 16- How do you make a
14- Why don’t they serve chocolate in prison? A: Because it makes you break out! 15- What kind of keys do kids like to carry? Cookies! 16- How do you make a
15- What kind of keys do kids like to carry? Cookies! 16- How do you make a
16- How do you make a milk shake? Give it a good scare! 17- Why don’t you starve in a desert? Because of all the ‘sand which is’ there. 18- What is white, has a horn, and gives milk? A dairy truck! 19- Waiter, this food tastes kind of funny? Then why aren’t you laughing! 20- What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish? A crab
17- Why don’t you starve in a desert? Because of all the ‘sand which is’ there. 18- What is white, has a horn, and gives milk? A dairy truck! 19- Waiter, this food tastes kind of funny? Then why aren’t you laughing! 20- What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish? A crab
18- What is white, has a horn, and gives milk? A dairy truck! 19- Waiter, this food tastes kind of funny? Then why aren’t you laughing! 20- What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish? A crab
19- Waiter, this food tastes kind of funny? Then why aren’t you laughing! 20- What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish? A crab
20- What do you get if you cross an apple with a shellfish? A crab apple ! 21- Why did Eve want to leave the garden of Eden and move to New
21- Why did Eve want to leave the garden of Eden and move to New York ? She fell for the Big Apple !
22- Why did the farmer hang raincoats all over his orchard? Someone told him he should get an apple Mac
23- How do you make an apple turnover? Push it down hill.
24- What kind of apple isn’t an apple? A pineapple.
25- What did the apple say to the apple pie? “You’ve got some crust.”
26- If an apple a day keeps the doctor away, what does an onion do? Keeps everyone away
27- Why are apples afraid to grow in the United States? Because they don’t want to be as American as apple pie.
28- What did man say to the guacamole? Avocado (I’ve got a) crush on you.
29- What did the fruit say at the civil rights rally? Avocado (I’ve got a) dream.
30- Why did Eve bite the forbidden apple? Because it tasted better than Adam’s banana
31- What did the Egg say to the boiling water? It’s going to take awhile to get me hard I just got laid by some chick!
32- What did the hurricane say to the coconut palm tree? Hold on to your nuts, this is no ordinary blow job!
33- What’s green and smells like bacon? Kermit the Frog’s finger!
34- What would happen if pigs could fly? The price of bacon would go skyrocket.
35- I love when candy canes are mint condition
36- If life throws you melons, you might be dyslexic
37- I think every morning that I’m going to make pancakes, but I keep waffling.
38- The majority of people find bananas a peeling.
39- Turning vegan is a big missed steak
40- A guy just threw milk at me.. How dairy?!
41- Drinking too much coffee can cause latte problems 42- A boiled egg in the morning is hard to beat.
43- It was an emotional wedding. Even the cake was in tiers
44- Tea is for mugs
45- Did you hear about the guy who got hit in the head with a can of soda? He was lucky it was a soft drink.
46- My friend’s bakery burned down last night. Now his business is toast.
47- Cheese. It is great for you
48- When two vegetarians are arguing, is it still considered beef?
49- Two peanuts walk into a bar and one was a salted.
50- Stealing someone’s coffee is called mugging
51- This girl said she recognized me from the vegetarian club. But I’ve never met herbivore! 52- I wrote a song for a tortilla. Well, it’s more of a wrap.
53- Why couldn’t the sesame seed leave the gambling casino? Because he was on a roll.
54- Mushroom walks in a bar, bartender says “Hey you can’t drink here.” Mushroom says “Why not, I’m a Fun-gi!”
55- What do you call a fake noodle? An Impasta.
56- I tried to get into my house the other day, but I couldn’t. Wanna know why? Because I had gnocchi!
57- When life gives you lemons, squeeze them in peoples eyes.
58- Take life with a grain of salt, a slice of lemon, and a shot of tequila. I thought I was drowning in Sprite, but it was only a Fanta sea. I have a job crushing Sierra Mist cans. It’s soda pressing.
59- Why did the lemon go to the doctor? It wasn’t peeling well.
60- What day do eggs hate most? Fry-day!
61- What did Snow White call her chicken? Egg white.
62- How do eggs leave the highway? By going through the eggs-it.
63- How do comedians like their eggs? Funny side up!
64- How do monsters like their eggs? Terri-fried!
65- What do chickens call a school test? Eggs-amination!
66- What’s the difference between you and eggs? Eggs get laid and you don’t
67- What did the eggs do when the light turned green? They egg-celerated!
68- Did you hear about McDonalds? They eggspanded the breakfast menu.
69- Why is Kristy Alley so fat? Because she did not eggsercise!
70- What word backwards can predict the future? Cookies (Seikooc as in psychic of you say it)
71- Why do basketball players love cookies? Because they can dunk them!
72- What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed? A cookie sheet!
73- What is a monster’s favorite food? Ghoul scout cookies.
74- How do you make Ohio State University cookies? Put them in a big Bowl and beat for 3 hours.