What is One Difference Between a Clarinet and a Mouse? You can’t hear a mouse squeak over the entire band.

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What’s the definition of a minor second? Two oboists playing in perfect unison.

95

What is the Difference Between a Saxophone and a Lawnmower? Lawnmowers sound better in small ensembles.

142

What concert costs 45 cents? 50 cent featuring Nickelback

133

What do you call a beautiful woman on a trombonist’s arm? A tattoo.

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How many record producers does it take to change a lightbulb? Two… one to tell the engineer to do it, the other to say I don’t know, what do you think?

135

What do you do if your bassist is drowning? Throw him his amp.

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How many guitar players does it take to cover a Stevie Ray Vaughn tune ? Evidently all of them.

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How do you get a guitar player off of your front porch ? Pay for the pizza.

147

What did the guitarist do when his teacher told him to turn his amplifier on? He caressed it softly and told it that he loved it

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