The funniest zoo puns collection by Puns Ville
A man went to work for a zoo veterinarian. “Look in the lion’s mouth,” the vet told him. “How do I do that?” he asked. “Carefully,” replied the vet.
Why did the Irishman buy two tickets to the zoo? One to get in and one to get out.
I was in the zoo last week. Really? Which cage were you in?
I took my son to the zoo yesterday. Really, did they accept him?
Some vampires went to see Dracula. They said, “Drac, we want to open a zoo.
Have you got any advice?” “Yes,” replied Dracula, “have lots of giraffes.”
Come on, Fred, I ll take you to the zoo. If the zoo wants me, let them come and get me!
Zoo visitor: What’s the new baby hippo’s name? Hippopotamus keeper: I don’t know, he won’t tell
You don’t see many reindeer in zoos, do you? No. They can’t afford the admission.
Zoo Keeper:”I’ve lost one of my elephants” Other Zoo Keeper:”Why don’t you put an advert in the paper?” Zoo Keeper:”Don’t be silly, he can’t read!”
What did the zoo keeper say when he saw four elephants walking over the hill towards him wearing sunglasses? Nothing, he didn’t recognize them!
“So how was it?” Elaine asked when they returned home. “Great,” Little Jordan replied. “Did you and your father have a good time?” asked Elaine. “Yeah, Daddy especially liked it,” exclaimed Jordan, excitedly, “especially when one of the animals came racing home at 30 to 1!”
What’s the difference between a Northern zoo and a Southern zoo?In a Northern zoo you have the name of the animal and the Latin name underneath. In a Southern zoo you haven the name of the animal and a recipe underneath.
FRED: Did I ever tell you about the time I came face to face with a very fierce gorilla? BERT: No, what
happened? FRED: Well, I stood there, without a gun . . . The gorilla looked at me and snarled and roared and beat his chest. Then it came closer and closer . . .BERT: What did you do? FRED: Oh, I’d had enough, so I moved on to the next cage.
When an ape visits his tailor, what kind of a suit does he order? A zoo-t suit!
What did the Hollywood producer say to the Apes in the zoo when they refused to sign contracts to appear in his new film? Stop playing it cagey!
A Scotsman paying his first visit to a zoo stopped by one of the cages”An’ whut animal would that be ?” he asked the keeper.”Thats a moose from Canada”, came the reply.”A moose !!”, exclaimed the Scotsman. “Hoots, mon, if that’s a moose then they must ha’ rats the size of elephants over there !”
Caller: Finally! I got through! I’ve been trying to call the zoo for hours! Zookeeper: Yes, all our lions were busy!
Two young nuns having just been ordained were on a holiday in New York City and were standing in front of the gorilla cage at the Bronx Zoo. The gorilla took one look at this beautiful young nun, bent the bars, lept to the ground and kissed her. Then he went back into his cage, straightened the bars and resumed thumping on his massive chest. The nouns met again a week later and one of the nouns asked her friend,”I have one question.Did he sent flowers afterwards…?”
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