Hilarious tree puns you can laugh at
How does a tree get on the Internet? It logs in.
Friend went to a Star Trek fancy dress party dressed as a tree. He was the Captain’s Log.
A local bank is opening an ATM in a tree. If its successful, they might expand to other branches.
I used to spend lots of time with a friend in his tree house. Then we fell out.
A friend is tracing his family tree. He’s not very good at drawing.
A friend asked what an acorn is. I said, “in a nut shell, it’s an oak tree”.
Local police force has recruited a tree. It’s Special Branch.
Someone took my mate’s fake Christmas tree. It’s not fir.
What do you get hanging from ash trees? Sore arms.
What cheese do you use to encourage a bear out of a tree? Camembert.
How do trees access the internet? They log on.
What did the tree do when the bank closed? It started its own branch.
Why did the pine tree get in trouble? Because it was being knotty.
What did the trees wear to Mother Nature’s pool party? Swimming trunks!
A crime was committed in the forest, and the police are stumped.
Who did it? Yew know who.
Do you want a brief explanation of an acorn? In a nutshell, it’s an oak tree.
What do you get when you cross a tabby cat with a lemon tree? A sour puss.
What did Betula pendula say to her super-annoying sister? Leaf me alone, birch!
Did you know that I can cut down a dead tree just by looking at it? It’s true. I saw it with my own eyes!
What type of tree fits in your hand? A palm tree.
How do you properly identify a dogwood tree? By the bark!
What did the beaver say to the tree? It’s been nice gnawing you!
Where do saplings go to learn? Elementree school.
Why do trees make great thieves? Sticky fingers.
Why can’t the lonely evergreen stop thinking about high school? She’s still pining to be one of the poplar kids.
Which side of a tree has the most leaves? The outside
What did the tree wear to the pool party? Swimming trunks!
What did the beaver say to the tree? It’s been nice gnawing you!
Why did the leaf go to the doctor? It was feeling green!
What is a tree’s least favorite month? Sep-timber!
What kind of tree can fit into your hand? A palm tree!
How do trees get on the internet? They log in.
How can you tell that a tree is a dogwood tree? By its bark!
What did the little tree say to the big tree? Leaf me alone!
Did you hear the one about the oak tree? It’s a corn-y one!
Why did the pine tree get into trouble? Because it was being knotty
What did the tree do when the bank closed? It started a new branch
Why are Tree Huggers bad at playing cards? They like to avoid the flush.
What did Obi Wan Kenobi say to the tree? May the Forest be with you.
Why did the leaf go to the doctor? It was feeling green!
What is a tree’s least favorite month? Sep-timber!
What did the Tree Hugging hottie say to the guy in the SUV? “Turning off your Engine, gets my motor humming”
How do Republicans plan on fighting record high temperatures? By switching from Fahrenheit to Celsius!
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