Pizza Puns

The best pizza puns collection ever, by Puns Ville

Pizza Puns

What did the parmesan say when it broke up with mozzarella? Sorry, but I am just too mature for you.

What does an anteater like on its pizza? Ant-chovies!

What type of person doesn’t love pizza? A weirDOUGH!

What did the pizza ask its toppings? Are we feta off alone?!

What did the pizza say when it asked the topping out on a date? I never SAUsage a beautiful face

“Waiter, will my pizza be long?” “No sir, it will be round!”

What do a gynocologist and a pizza boy have in common? They can smell it but they cant eat it!

What is a dog’s favorite pizza? PUParonni!

What did the pepperoni say to the cook? You wanna pizza me?

When can a pizza marry a hot dog? After they have a very frank relationship! Want to hear a joke about pizza? Never mind, it’s too cheesy.

How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.

What does an aardvark like on its pizza? Ant-chovies.

How do you get the Arizona State grad off your front porch? Pay for the pizza

What’s the difference between an Mel Gibson movie and a pizza? Pizzas are good.

What’s the difference between a redneck and a large pepperoni pizza? A large pepperoni pizza can feed a family of four!

What kind of pizza do you order on Christmas? Cheeses Crust.

What is the difference between a gay pizza delivery driver and a freezer? A freezer doesn’t fart when you pull the meat out!

What’s the difference between a pizza and my pizza jokes? My pizza jokes can’t be topped! Pizza shop slogan: “7 days without pizza makes one weak.”

There are two types of people in this world: People who love pizza and liars.

What do you call a sleeping pizza? a piZZZZZZa.

Why did the man go into the pizza business? He wanted to make some dough.

Where do pepperonis go on vacation? The Leaning Tower of Pizza.

Why is a pizza better than Justin Bieber? Everything’s better than that piece of shit.

Why did Pizza Hut stop delivering pizza to the ghetto? Cuz they were told that Dominoes was always getting played!

Warning! Pizza will make your clothes shrink.

Pizza in Japan An American businessman goes to Japan on a business trip, but he hates Japanese food, so he asks the concierge at his hotel if there’s any place around where he can get American food.

The concierge tells him he’s in luck; there’s a pizza place that just opened, and they deliver. The concierge gives the businessman the phone number, and he goes back to his room and orders a pizza. Thirty minutes later, the delivery guy shows up to the door with the pizza. The businessman takes the pizza, and starts sneezing uncontrollably. He asks the delivery man, ”What the heck did you put on this pizza?” The delivery man bows deeply and says, “We put on the pizza what you ordered, pepper only.”

How do you fix a broken pizza? With tomato paste.

Why did the hipster burn his mouth while eating his pizza? He ate it way before it was cool.

What did the pizza say to the delivery guy? “You don’t pepper-own me.” and what did the delivery guy say in reply? “Hey now, don’t get saucy.”

What does a pizza wear to smell good? Calzogne.

What did the pepperoni say to the slice of cheese? “Slice to meat you!”

Why does the mushroom always get invited to pizza parties? Because he’s such a fungi! Where do pepperonis go on vacation? The Leaning Tower of Pizza.

What type of person doesn’t like pizza? A weir-dough.

What did the pizza say when it went out on a date? “I never sausage a beautiful face.”

What did the pizza slicer say when he wanted to rob the pizza? “Hand over the dough or I’ll cut you!”

Did you hear about the Italian chef with the terminal illness? He pastaway. Now he’s just a pizza history.

What’s a pizza maker’s favorite song? Slice, Slice Baby

Why was the pizzeria desperate for business? Because they kneaded the dough!

What’s your dog’s favorite kind of pizza? PUPeroni

How do you know if you’re in love? If they steal a pizza your heart!

What does a pizza say when it wants to cuddle? Fold me close!

What did the boss say to his pizza during their meeting? There’s mushroom for improvement!

What does a pizza say when it introduces itself to you? Slice to meet you!

Enjoyed these pizza puns? Check also:

Food Puns

Breakfast Puns

Cheese Puns

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