Fire Puns

One of the funniest workplace puns; fire puns. Here is the funniest collection of fire puns 

fire puns

A father got blazing mad when he found a fire set by his boy behind their house and said ‘I don’t want arson doing things like that.

Did you hear about that circus fire? It was in tents.

Did you hear about the fire at the circus? The heat was in tents.

Did you hear about the fire at the shoe factory? A thousand soles got burned, some heel did it while he was laced.

I’d really be tempted to take these trousers out back and set them on fire, but I’ve never been one for burning my britches.

Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly; but when they lit a fire in the craft, it sank, proving once and for all that you can’t have your kayak and heat it.

We spent all day debating about housefires. It was quite a heated argument.

When a fire broke out in the barber shop it was a close shave but everyone got out by a whisker.

With only one piece of wood, I tried to convince the fire to light by use of a monologue.

My granpa always said you should fight fire with fire.

Maybe that’s why he got fired from the fire service.

I’ve been trying to climb the ladder at work for years now. Maybe I’m just not cut out to be a firefighter.

They say if you can’t stand the heat, get out of the kitchen…Which is why I lost my job as a firefighter.

What did the firefighter say when the church caught on fire? “Holy smoke!”

I was telling a joke about a house that burned down to a firefighter the other day. He had to be there.

How do you know which locker belongs to a female firefighter? Just look for the one with 20 pairs of fire boots under it.

What’s the difference between a soldier and a private employee ?? Only one of’em is afraid of firing.

What do you say when some McD in a slum needs equipments ?? Requires Fryer in the hole.

Give a man a fish, he eats for a day.
Teach a man to fish, he eats for a lifetime.
Give a man a fire, he’s warm for a day.
Set a man on fire, he’s warm for the rest of his life.

A house, inhabited by a Greek on ground level, an Italian on first floor and a German on second, got on fire. Who survived? The German. He was out practicing marching.

How do you make a cat go ‘woof’? Soak it in petrol and set it on fire.

A Kentuckian came home and found his house on fire, rushed next door, telephoned the fire department and shouted, “Hurry over here. My house is on fire!” “OK,” replied the fireman, “how do we get there?” “Say, don’t you still have those big red trucks?”

Why do ducks have webbed feet? To stamp out fires.

Why do elephants have flat feet? To stamp out burning ducks.

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