What did the father tomato say to the baby tomato whilst on a family walk? Ketchup.

99

Breaking news! Energizer Bunny arrested – charged with battery

49

I hate perforated lines, they’re tearable.

60

Just watched a documentary about beavers… It was the best damn program I’ve ever seen.

51

There’s a new type of broom out, it’s sweeping the nation.

58

Atheism is a non-prophet organisation.

83

Slept like a log last night … woke up in the fireplace.

56

I don’t trust stairs. They’re always up to something.

56

RIP boiled water. You will be mist.

40

What kind of fish is made of only 2 sodium atoms? 2 Na

51