Birthday Puns

Funniest birthday puns ever

birthday puns

Thank you for your birthday wishes on Facebook. Who are you by the way?

You know you are getting old when you start getting birthday cards from your orthopedist.

Honey, you really don’t have to do the dishes on your birthday. Do it tomorrow.

Your upcoming birthday reminds me of the words of the old Chinese scholar: Yung No Mo

What did one candle say to the other? “Don’t birthdays burn you up?”

“Were any famous men born on your birthday?” “No, only little babies.”

Why did the boy feel warm on his birthday? Because people kept toasting him!

What do they serve at birthday parties in heaven? Angel food cake, of course!

What’s the best way to get a man to remember your anniversary? Get married on his birthday.

What has wings, a long tail, and wears a bow? A birthday pheasant!

How does Moby Dick celebrate his birthday? He has a whale of a party!

What did one candle say to the other? “Don’t birthdays burn you up?”

What was the average age of a cave man? Stone Age!

Why couldn’t prehistoric man send birthday cards? The stamps kept falling off the rocks!

Why was the birthday cake as hard as a rock? Because it was marble cake!

What does a clam do on his birthday? He shellabrates!

What party game do rabbits like to play? Musical Hares!

What does a cat like to eat on his birthday? Mice cream and cake!

Where do you find a birthday present for a cat? In a cat-alogue!

Why did everyone hide from Sue on her birthday? Because they wanted her to be Sue-prised!

What is a meaning of a true friend? One who remembers your birthday but not your age!

What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday? Thanks. I’ll never part with it!

Why are birthday’s good for you? Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest!

What did the ice-cream say to the unhappy birthday cake? “What’s eating you?”

When is a birthday cake like a golf ball? When it’s been sliced.

What do you give nine-hundred-pound gorilla for his birthday? I don’t know, but you’d better hope he likes it!

Did you hear about the love affair between sugar and cream? It was icing on the cake.

What happens when no one comes to your birthday party? You can have your cake and eat it too.

Did you hear about the dancer’s birthday? It was a tappy one!

How can you tell that you’re getting old? You go to an antique auction and three people bid on you!

Did you hear about the flag’s birthday? It was a flappy one!

When I was a child my family were so poor that the only thing I got on my birthday was a year older.

My Husband said he wanted a tie for his birthday that matched the color of his eyes – but where can you find a bloodshot tie?

My wife refuses to use Inter Flora for people’s birthdays. She says she doesn’t think people would like margarine as a present.

It’s my wife’s birthday tomorrow. Last week I asked her what she wanted as a present.
“Oh, I don’t know,” she said. “Just give me something with diamonds.”

That’s why I’m giving her a pack of playing cards.

Enjoyed these birthday puns? Check also:

Cake Puns

Food Puns

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